After a great first date comes the agony: “Do I call first, or wait? What about tomorrow? Next week? Next month?”

Just like any budding relationship, the follow-up steps from a successful first meeting with a financial planner are not set in stone. So, if you’ve taken the plunge and found your money match, now you need to consider "The Rules" of the relationship.

• In the beginning, the interaction between you and your planner should be intense. Your planner will want to know everything about you, what you have, what you’ve done, what you would like to do – with your money and your life, of course. You may need several meetings for this heady process of disclosure and discovery to play out. You should be even more honest with your planner than you might be with a romantic partner: go ahead and tell your planner about every one of your former advisory relationships and your past financial indiscretions. Your planner will love you for being open. 
• A good relationship will inevitably settle down into something more predictable. If your planner is helping you with portfolio management, a quarterly meeting is the norm. Anything less than annually just will not keep the relationship alive. Be sure to tell your planner what frequency is most comfortable for you. 
• Money can often get in the way of relationships – this one even more so. If you are paying for the planner’s time, either hourly or on retainer, you may be reluctant to meet very often. On the other hand, if you are paying a fixed fee or an assets-under-management fee, you might be motivated to ask for a lot of time. Keep your focus on the value you are getting from the relationship and not the dollars spent per minute of interaction. If everything is going well, and there is no need to meet, you’re both better for it. After all, this relationship is all about security, both personal and financial.
• Sometimes you just "have to talk." A change in your circumstances – a job loss, an offer on a house, or even when you are thinking of seeing someone else. Be sure to talk over these changes in fortune or heart with your planner. The relationship will improve from these necessary conversations or will at least end on a positive note.
  

As for who calls whom? As we all know, there are ridiculous excuses we women make for men not calling back: his grandmother died, he had to go to Pittsburgh, he’s on dial-up. When it comes to your financial planner, it is a whole lot easier. There are NO excuses for not calling or communicating with you periodically. Market’s down 500 points?  There has been a major tax law change? The office has moved and has changed its phone number? It is okay, ladies (and gents) in this case to keep your cell phone right at your side. A good planner will definitely be calling you.