The word newlywed conjures up thoughts of young love and starting a life together. For others, the love might be young, but the people might not be. These two different situations share the same question about whether or not to combing the financial accounts into one. The answers can be totally different. Here’s why.

Young, first marriage, no kids or other responsibilities: When you are young, have few assets and are just starting out, it's likely that a joint account will help more than separate accounts. The merger of your finances shows your commitment in another way. Holding on to separate accounts may seem like one or both of you is looking for a life boat right from the beginning. Combining accounts can signify working toward common goals. Instead of 'your money' and 'my money,' think of it as 'our money' right from the beginning. Then discuss how the money is spent as you move toward your joint goals and priorities. If more communication is better, then separate accounts may be worse.

The drawback to this is that one spouse may rely totally on the other spouse to handle the finances and won't get involved at all. This can result in a shocking surprise in the future. Both spouses need to be part of the financial decision making process. If it takes separate accounts to make that happen, then that’s what you should do. It comes down to communication and finding the best way to make both spouses aware and understand the impact of their financial decisions.

Not so young, not your first marriage, or other children are involved: Marriage the second time (or more) is often financially complicated. And because older people may not only have significantly different financial responsibilities, but also may be set in their ways, combining accounts will likely be harder emotionally.

Well before taking your vows, there needs to be a discussion on how money will be handled and a system needs to be put in place. Clearly this is where prenuptial agreements should be discussed. Also, discuss how each spouse handles their money now, before marriage. Are they good at paying bills, living on a budget, and do they have solid credit? Create a combined balance sheet and income statement. If there is a large disparity, then discuss how that will be remedied going forward. Avoid letting assumptions cause problems in the marriage from the beginning.

For example, lets use a couple we call Sam and Carla. If Sam has high debt and poor credit, he might assume that Carla will help remedy the situation. Carla may assume that Sam will already know that it’s his responsibility to get the debt paid without any help. Also, she might assume that he will change poor spending habits so they don’t create that problem again. Detailed discussion about money, although potentially painful, will reduce problems going forward.

If discussions result in difficulty in a total merger of accounts, consider a middle ground. There isn’t a limitation on the number of checking accounts you can have. So if you agree that you want some autonomy, then consider setting up a joint account and keeping your individual accounts. Then simply create a budget where each spouse contributes to the joint account, typically in proportion to their income.

In conclusion, regardless if this is first love or most recent love, combining finances will best be facilitated through discussion, communication, and the avoidance of assumptions. Remember, it’s better to know than to not.